had extra da zu today..did projecct aft tt
ytd night went shoppin for the clothes needed to be worn durin the performance on wed
spent fr three hrs lookin...bought ll clothes needed
oso new school shoes...hope to wear very long time
cuz it costed my ma 119 dollars...its puma one
didnt hav good n happy days nowadays
juz seem to get things right...
i failed my area n perimeter maths test-13/30
nvm..predicted tt i will fail already..
if my maths fail which means my eng common test will oso fail
nt gettin anywhere still...
tryin to mak myself move on but...
hw could this happen to me?...
i tried my best to be happy..i really tried very hard
nth is tyin me down nw but i juz cant seem to be happy
why life is like tt ?
i wanna cry but cantt...wad kinda crap is tis?
i looked into the mirror..i said i love u
i was tellin myself tt...but tt juz cant cover the fact tt i am so disgusted by myself
i cant study welll...i cant handle my frens well..
i lost a used to be very impt fren to me
i juz feel so disgusted by my fren tt i dont wan anithing to do with him
but he did nth wrong towards me..
he still treats me as a very gud buddy bt i ....
i cant let my ma happy..my pipa was crap
my hw was shit...i juz kept offendin people...
laugh i may, smile i did...when i do all these i dont noe if i am realy happy
there shouldnt be a reason tt i should be sad cuz i am ovr with everything
i really miss last yr...i really miss it...but i did nt cherish it earlier
it is juz too late...within this yr i changed alot...
i tried to used the way to mak myself happi like last yr
but it juz cant seem to work...i miss the days
the fairy tale like days...i go nuts n insane at times
always rather...cuz when i am doin tt, feel happy
i wun go ask myself if it is real happiness or nt
as i dun wanan knw the fact..
i am realli tryin my very best to be happy
but...i juz dun understand why is this happenin to me
where did the happy go lucky cy went?..
the world is black n i guess it is true..
lookin back at the beginnin of the yr...
did many silly things tt changed my life
i sadded cuz of a guy..who i feel disgusted by nw
i wondered why were i so sad
i found a ans for tt...i wasnt likin him aft the break up
i juz felt pity for the wonderful past we had
the happy frenship we had compared to the nt so nice feelin i hav towards u
i wasnt in lov with him at all
maybe even the first place..
sry hong kai..i guess i juz took u as a replacement by mistake
but thanks for being there
whenever music is heard, my heart juz weights down..
juz dunno why...when i hear back the songs i hear last yr
i get more sad...i am missin the smiles...the true smiles
i tot i could it this yr oso....but it was even more fake
i used to think my pri sch was full of cunnin people
nt in my class although...but this sch seems to be even worse?
i should have gone back to sac...maybe i would be happier
but theres no use regretin the things that hav been done..
i juz wanna turn my back toward all the things...n juz walk away
but there is still smone holdin me back...u people dun anihw think
tt person is a girl..bt i'm nt les...
i guess i am juz over relyin on her...
wad happens when this person leav?..i dunno
i juz wish she wun leave at all...she is a person who always let me poke
n also switched off the fan for my sake when i say i'm cold
u noe hu u r..
life isnt as as smooth as hw we think always
i know i am nt the onli one who is depressed..
so i wun say as if i am the onli one
i'l realli try my best ..to be happy..
-lookin into the mirror n say iluvu cy isnt a easy thing
cuz i think i dun luv anyone..as my heart has alreadysank to the bottom of the sea
n nvr be retrived...
